Forgiven, not forgotten....My beloved Siew Choo

Siew Choo,

It's been 2 years.....I had never talked to you, met you nor heard of you. I have been wondering how you have been. All these long, I kept you in my heart, it really hurts when I see you in another man's arms. It hurts more when I recalled the last time we met, you tells me you still loves me, but u cant come back.
Now, 2 years have passed.....Finally yesterday, I finally made the decision to contact you. Finally hear your own voice, your soul....Im delighted. So many things happened to you, somehow you pulled through all the pains. Im glad I heard of your situation and what have you been all these while from your own mouth, your own words. Im relieved now that you are OK.

Siew Choo,
How may I tell you, or show you, or by any chance to tell u that, I STILL LOVE YOU. I wanted to go back to Taiping to meet you to tell you how much I love you, how much I longed to hold your hands again, to protect you n stay by your side.

In the past....

When I wanted you, I thought you dont want me.....
When you wanted me, I thought its best to let you be with another person....
Now.....
I really want you....I wonders do you want me now ?

Love is so confusing....Yet I really love you and longed for an answer from you, Siew Choo.

Your life...The way you decribe to me now, you have given up dreams n hope, you have changed into a bitter person, the person that I donot really recalled as the real you.

How may I show you new hope n life ? I really want to show you. I just wish, you will sincerely open up your heart when we meet , and tell me n talk to me sicerely about your life , my life....and perhaps.....OUR LIVES TOGETHER if its possible.

GOD, show me a way....Show her a way too....GUIDE US.....

Practising whole night.....

I have been up all night again. I couldn't sleep, searched n surfed whole night searching for infomation about violin playing techniques. I wasn't sastified with the way Im playing now. It's so lame n amatuer. Imagine you could only play songs, but not FEEL the song. I hated this situation. There must be some way, some method, some info on the web that could help me, there must be!

Ahh! After a long search, I believe I have found some answers.....


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"The old way of playing the fiddle" and the "New Way".... that may be how the cartoonist saw it, but for violinists today who wish to play German baroque violin pieces as they were written and intended to be heard, it is not quite so simple! The German baroque violin bow was quite different from the Italian bow in design, construction and method of use. Bach, himself an accomplished violinist, was familiar with both types of bow, choosing to use - and to compose for - one or the other as best suited the music and circumstances in performance. The two types of bow in current use during baroque times reflected the German, and the Italian musical traditions and the music which these traditions produced.

Italian music was light and airy, requiring agility and rapidity. German music was more introspective; tempi were slower, and the music frequently required individual string players to produce true chords.

These two musical styles were reflected in the violin bows. The Italian bow was slim and light, the bow strings fixed in relatively high tension, while the German bow was highly arched, and the string tension was fairly loose. In contrast to the Italian technique of holding the bow lightly from above with curved wrist, the German bow was held with the thumb placed under the bow strings. In this way the player could tighten or relax the bowstring tension at will. A tighter tension in the bow was used for single string, single melodic line playing, while a relaxing of the bowstrings’ tension permitted playing on two or more strings simultaneously, and thus of course, the playing of true chords.

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The German/French firm BACH BOGENare Designers and Manufacturers of Curved Bows for Violin, Viola and Cello. Their site (English and German) offers photos, literature, CDs etc on the curved bow. Rostropovitch cooperated extensively on the design and testing of their bows, and several contemporary composers, such as John Cage, Walter Zimmermann, and Dieter Schnebel have written new works exploiting their potential.

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The most sastified breakthrough I ever attempt tonite (or morning) , is the VIBRATO technique. I have been wondering how to do that......Suddenly, I thought *Maybe just like a Guitar?*

Bingo, I use the same technique, well nearly same..... Constanly apllies n un-apllies pressure on the strings which I am pressing, and VIOLA! It works! Yipee! VIBRATOOOOOOO!

I also realized by adding certain tension n movement on the bow, it produce Vibrato effects too. How glad am I to discover this ( Dun comment too much, this is a DIY violin lesson after all) in one night. But I understand there are much to learn, much much much MORE.....

And from 2am-820am (now) I'm still awake since yesterday. GOSH! Later I'm the pianist for Worhip.....I hope I wont doze off!

I love my violin...There more I look at it, I can virtually forgets everything (almost everything) that existed around me, all the problems or anything!

I guess Piano and Violin really turns me on! None other instruments ever turn me on so much, none ever !

*Mom, I changed my mind, I wanna be a top violinist!*

Dried pockets, with a solemn Voilin as my contender

Last week, I bought my long awaited dream-instrument. Its called a VIOLIN. Hurray!

Johann Strauss Jr played it well, Schubert made wonderful tunes with it, Itsyak Perlmann solo-ed it in many performance, and now, Kendrick is learning how to play it!

At first, I couldn't get any decent tune from my bow n strings. It sqeaked like a cock-who-having-a-bad-sore throat. But somehow I got the hang of it.

Just today, I surfed alot DIY-Voilin lessons with pictures n diahgrams showing the basic n proper way to hold a voilin, and how to plays it. Learn quite a few things, n actually was shocked that there are many other things to concern of how to plays, take care and preserve a violin.

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They say Violin can makes very fine, smooth supple tune as your bow waltzes on the strings. I personally finds it is rather true, just like playing the piano, you need to concentrate n put alot efforts n feel the tune with ur heart. Otherwise, funny squeaking sound will be heard again once the angle n the speed of the bow is incorrect.

A voilin can really makes a wonderful tune which romances your soul with the most echanting melody.It can oso create a very sorrow tune that human voice are unable to dscribe.

Speaking of sorrow, sigh....Im quite sorrow at the moment. Blame me for miscalculated my money n spent it for fixing my car for RM250. I miscalculated that my pay for my job n my part-time singing salary will arrive by Tuesday. I get to find out that my money only comes to me around 7-10th May. This is really bad when a small potato like me staying in a BIG city like PJ. I miss mama now. How wonderful to be home with a fridge full of food supplies and a loving family to warm my loneliness up!

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Yeah! A Violin is the answer! For nearly a decade, I have spent my chilhood in loneliness. Parents never spent much time with me, and I cry alot, weep alot....Mostly infront of my mahogany-colored Piano. Thats why there a deep bond between me n my piano, and thus how my piano skills revived.

Now, again lonely, in a big city facing diffuculties, my new lover, my Violin is here! I have been playing it for a few days till deep late nights in my a place where no one will be able to disturb me. I really thank GOD that He gave me a music talent, which enable me to learn any intrument and understands how to play them well in such a short time.

My 1st song I ever attempt to play was

1. He Leadeth Me

2. Jesus Loves Me

3. As A Deer

4. Fa Ru Xue melody solo (Jay Chou)

So far so good, I can say Im about 50% to play a voilin properly now. Perhaps I will meet someone who knows how to play a voilin properly in my church. And hopefully, he/she is willing to teach me, as well Im willing to trade my Piano or Guitar tips with him/her...Hehehe!

GOD, I seriously need some income tomorrow.....Plz prepare for me....Sigh....

Today's crapping ( Posing with my guitar )

A SELF POTRAIT OF ME

As usual, back in office to work again, yet.....There's no artwork pending

at the moment. Boss told me May only will start a new project. So everyday

come to office online, blogging, practise 3D Max, practise guitar, crapping with

frens. And here, now snapping alot foto just now, playing with my SONY DSC-P10.

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SINGING IN CHERAS TOMORROW NIGHT.

Tommorrow, will be going to a cafe to sing, which was formally WOW WOW CAFE,

now I not so sure whats the name of the cafe. And I will be singing with a male

singer whom I never met before nor partner before. Sometimes I hate to do these

things, cuz singing with a stranger, the FEEL is not there.

Ah well....I had this kind of experience many many times. Somehow, the feel will

come after a few songs. Its kinda fun to do these things, expect those unexpected.

Anyway, Im still seeking good guitarist or voilinist, who can sing as well. Hope to meet

such person as soon as possible. Its really hard to find good sessionist/singer these

days. I really crave for a good performance like *THE CORRS* unplugged on stage.

Cuz these days, alot singers in cafes doesnt seems right, they DONOT have the passion

for good music, just singing for the pay. Sigh.....

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Anyway, Im a loooooooong time classical music lover, a JOHN WILLIAMS, JAMES

HORNER and a DINO KARTSONAKIS lover! Their piano skills, they are purely

MAGICIANS rather than musicians. Cuz thier compositions (Mainly on the PIANO)

are magical, they posess magical melody that can heal your soul n ur mind. I have been

trying hard to digest thier styles n play like them.

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DAVID LANZ......yes....Mister LANZ is good pianist too. Now Im researching his

composition. I liked his VESUVIUS and BLACK HORSE(his piano).

Boy! This guy really makes RICHARD CLAYDERMAN so small, no match at all.

(Sorry, for me mr.Clayderman or GOLDFINGER is just grade 3 compositions)

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Haih.......Now I miss my drums lessons. Havent been practising any drums now. And

the office beside mine, they have a drum set in there. Often heard them plays it during

lunch time or tea time. But they never improve ( Cuz I have been listening to their drumming

for more than 5 months, never improve nor play other styles, SIANZ!)

So much for today's crapping......this is fun...! hehe!

Tea time! (foto snap by Ms.VEE)

THE CREATOR N THE BOOK

Finally, the long awaited directory are finally out! Im so ever exited to see it! This is the 1st time I get to see all my artwork in this book since the day I join this company. SWEET!

The BOOK......



Sony SpyCam Advert

Enginnering Listing Page

West End Cuisine, Singapore

Comon People, Say something on these Potrait (Leng Lui anot?)

Because there is NOT MUCH to blog about, here's 3 potraits of

WAA WAA that I drew yesterday. Do not blame me, as I have stopped drawing since my college days in MultiMedia (about 3yrs ago).

A *stamping effect* style (multi tone drawing marker pens)

Manga Draft (Marker Pen)

Manga Style ( Marker Pen )

HANG OUT WITH FREWNS in WONG KOK

WONG KOK Restaurant (Sri Kembangan)

We very free that nite, so went to see my partner's God-Sister singing unplugged in

WONG KOK Restaurant. Be the way, Halo Cafe is just a few shop-lots away ! hehe!

Inside WONG KOK, nicely lite romantic n warm lanterns.

The Stage.....Oso very nice decorated...

Eric n Wei En ( The singers, oso our frens)

They sung very well n sweet. (mana tau later, this Eric korek

me go up to sing oso.....xD....I sang AN JING - Jay Chou)

Frenz.....These guys are online gaming artists....

Newly made fren not long ago...

CHEEEEERS!

We ordered many funny looking drinks. Some beverage we dont even drank before.

Ah...Well, they taste nice after all.....

Chatting, drinking, crapping n listening to music.

Posing n listening to music

Eric, Kendrick, Steven

Finally, Its break time for da singer. Here, Eric posing with us, then he ordered

his fave french fries n shared with u. He claimed that french fries is his ingredient

for a good voice. (wierd but true)

WEI EN, KENDRICK , HAI NING

Wei En, joining us to snap foto while having a break from singing.

She is Hai Ning's old time buddy n god-sister. She sings well too.

Anyway, three of us are singers as well.(HaiNing looked alot

matured n lenglui without her glasses.DroLLs!)

Last snap before go home.

Due to US have to work tomollo, n 2 of the gurls need go to college. Haih, time

to say bye-bye liao. Been a great time n a nice place to hang-out.

OKAY THEN FOLKS, THATS ALL....

NOW I GONNA CRASH ON MY BED AND GO TO DREAMLAND.

WAA WAA OSO GONNA CRASH SOON, BUT AFTER ALL SHE INSPIRED

ME TO BLOG THIS FOTOS AT THIS HOUR, IM PURELY INNOCENT

TO BE BLAMED.

(4:31AM 20 April 2006)

Kendrick and Hai Ning

The singer which I am giving her training now.

She got sweet innocent voice.....

Steven and Kendrick (Me)

My cilaka fren snap this foto, see lah.....

His hand shaky wan when snap, wasted my

good Cyber Shot camera capabilities!

Geram-nyaaaaaa

Yvonne , Kendrick(me) and Willy

This are two nice ppl sat beside me

when we are participating the

SINGLES NITE event.

HEAVEN CAFE (The Curve)

--SINGLES NITE--

It has been an interesting night. Made alot new frens, and

its very coiencidence(how to spell this word?), that 90%

of these new friends are in CREATIVE ARTS FIELD, they

work in a ONLINE GAMING company. Great pic !